First, an announcement. Then, a story.
I quit my job so I can stay home with the kids. My last day is July 29. I’m super excited and also a little nervous. But 100% sure it’s the right decision.
Next, the story. This Monday started off as usual: wake up, shower, coffee, make bottles. My mother in law came to pick up Norah around 7:30; when I went outside to get the carseat loaded into her car, the air was sauna-humid but otherwise everything seemed pretty ordinary. Ten minutes later the entire sky went so dark it felt like someone turned the lights off. The wind came up quick and a huge branch from our neighbor’s tree broke off and snapped an entire row of power lines down. There was a blinding white flash, then a blinding orange flash, and orange sparks all over the street, power lines coiled in the neighbor’s driveway, more orange sparks. For a second I felt terrified, then realized I couldn’t get scared or David would freak out too. The storm died down just as quickly as it came, I spent 20 minutes trying to get the garage door open manually, and we hustled along into our day.
Monday night our power was still out. Mike went to get some ice for the coolers and we ordered a pizza. David was a little miffed that he couldn’t watch Sesame Street, and the house was hot. But we were okay.
After the kids went to sleep I sat on the front porch with a beer, called my mom, and then read until it was too dark to see the pages. I watched the lightning bugs blinking all over the neighborhood. A family of four raccoons (two big and two little, just like us) scurried across our lawn. They looked so funny I laughed out loud, and they all turned and looked at me and then raced across the street in a little furry lumpy line. The moon was really pretty and later we stood out talking to some people that live down the street that I swear I’ve never seen in my life.
I know having no power is a hassle. It disrupts everyone’s lives. We threw away a bunch of food and I found out my hair takes on a bad Janis Joplin quality when air dried. But you can’t deny that there’s something special about it. It forces everyone to slow down, unplug, talk to each other, look at the sky.
In the whole course of human history we haven’t lived this way for very long. And sometimes I worry about it a little. Are we supposed to be living like this? Cramming our huge rich lives into office cubicles and tiny screens on electronic devices? Living next door to people and not knowing a single them about them? Stressing out about stuff we know in our hearts doesn’t really matter? What’s the cost of it all? I don’t want to be a hypocrite though. I love the internet and I’m not about to throw away my TV and go live off the grid. It just feels good to simplify a little. It’s hard to feel stressed when you’re sitting in the dark power-less stillness of a starry backyard, splashing your feet in a lukewarm kiddie pool, because really, what else are you going to do?
And it’s why we’re making the decision for me to stay home. I know it’s not easy to be a full time mom, but it definitely seems a lot simpler. Sure, we'll miss my income, but if you know our family, you know we're kind of lame-o homebodies and barely go anywhere other than church and the grocery store. So it's not like we spend money frivolously anyway. I'm excited to make it work. Excited for all the possibilities of this new lifestyle.
Our power came back on by Tuesday afternoon. I know it sounds silly but I was actually a little disappointed.
(P.S.: thanks for reading all these paragraphs I just spilled out.)
